I survived Yom Kippur and all I got was this lousy headache

The good news is that it is easier to fast carrying an extra 5-10 pounds and nursing an infant who is happy to take a pumped bottle* than being 10 pounds underweight, 12 weeks pregnant, and nursing a toddler who will accept no substitutes.

But the nursing, it's still pretty dehydrating. I spent the last two hours of the holiday lying on the floor in my pajamas, praying not for a good fate for the next year, but not to pass out when I stood up to serve Miss Hysterical** her dessert.

Oh yeah. The kids have new names, just for today. Because from the time they woke up from their naps (well, it was AM's third nap) they were Miss Hysterical and Mr. Cranky. Really.not.fun, when you are trying very hard to finally make it through a fast day without becoming totally ill. (Success! Although apparently my "color" upon Taxman's return from shul left a lot to be desired.)

I spent (much) more time at the park today than at synagogue and more time reading board books than with a Yom Kippur prayerbook open. So I hope Taxman put in a good word for both of us, as it were. (He's just lucky I didn't call the Rescuers dispatcher and have him paged home during my dizzy spells. Actually, I am lucky I didn't try it, because he was at the hospital on a call!)

I hope that when I get my groove back, in the form of both kids sleeping through the night, I will be able to reconnect the disconnect that is my spiritual life. In the meantime, watching Miss Hysterical pick up little religious things at preschool is SO!CUTE! It doesn't preclude the sleeping, though. We can do both. Someday.

*AM had three bottles, mostly because I didn't have a whole lot of time last week to pump more. I gave him one of them, and it was weird for me. It's just not as snuggly as nursing, you know? But he didn't really seem to care one way or the other--I guess it all tastes the same to him.

**I don't mean this in the good (i.e. being funny) way. I mean in the "bursting into tears when I refused to nurse her, crying when I told her I felt sick, screaming when I left the room to put AM down for a nap" way. It was muy obnoxious, if I may be frank.